Every relationship faces a range of challenges and some relationships have more significant issues than others. As you encounter marriages and couples in your counseling practice, you will discover that many problems stem from how we handle conflict. John Gottman, a noted marriage, couple, and family counselor, claims that conflict in relationships is a normal process. However, Gottman believes that conflict becomes a problem when it is characterized by criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. When couples don’t effectively address these issues, the impact can be profound. Fortunately, there are evidence-based approaches that will help you to address these kinds of issues as a marriage, couple, and family counselor.
For this discussion consider the impact of poor conflict management strategies on couples and how to address these within a counseling relationship. As a counselor you will find that every couple or family relationship is unique. However, there are common factors that can be identified among couples that relate to unhealthy conflict. John Gottman said that criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling are the four horsemen of the apocalypse when it comes to relationships. As marriage, couple, and family counselors, it is important to be able to identify these factors and to be able to select effective interventions to address them. In addition to being able to recognize presenting problems, it will also be necessary to understand methods for building intimacy and communication skills.
• Consider how the issues discussed may impact a relationship.
• Perform an academic search in the Lamar University Library and select a scholarly article published in peer-reviewed journals in the last five years that examines a specific issue affecting couples who may enter the counseling setting (e.g., conflict, infidelity, career issues).
• Think about how the issues in the selected article may affect relationships, as well as how Gottman’s four horsemen may relate to these identified issues.
